In my last article, I described what we feel when we find ourselves at an important crossroads in our personal or professional lives, at key moments of our existence, following difficult or unusual events.

This article has raised questions, such as: “Well then, what happens afterwards?” or “Which actions should we undertake to open ourselves to new horizons?”

It is true that when we live through moments of transition, we feel that we mustwe must bring about radical changes to get out of the beaten track, yet we don’t know what we must do to implement such sweeping changes. At times we experience a kind of malaise vis-à-vis our routine and we wonder where it comes from or what it means. We are no longer the person we used to be and we are convinced that a change will be beneficial and at the same time attuned to our feelings of the moment.

In situations of change, our first reaction is to find a solution, according to the equation problem âžœ solution. It is a healthy attitude in our everyday life as well as in the professional world, governed by the search of profitable, quick, efficient, distinctive solutions. Besides, it reflects our brain’s makeup. It is also an appeasing answer, because it means that the problem no longer exists. However, my experience as a coach, as well as my personal experience, has taught me that when I need to effect an important change in my life, the equation problem âžœsolution does not work. It is in fact the urge to find a “quick fix” that often leads to fictitious solutions. Such solutions, however, will bring no useful answers to our real aspirations. A quick solution often does nothing to allay our anxiety or dispel our malaise.

I have therefore learned a lesson that is at the same time essential and surprisingly simple: when we feel that we must implement an in-depth change in our life, it is important to do absolutely nothing. It often happens that the more we struggle to find a solution, the more the solution escapes us, thus adding to our frustration. We spend enormous energies in this hopeless search without ever approaching the desired goal.

Hence the idea of doing something counterintuitive, i.e. stop looking for a solution. This is not an encouragement to adopt a passive attitude, but rather an active wait. It is an essential step to prepare our inner ground to embrace a real and profound solution, both within and around us. It is a sort of withdrawal which will enable us to build a solid base on which to develop a solution. In a way, it is like preparing an inner nest to welcome future changes.

It is therefore very important, while leading a normal everyday life, to:

1. touch land and rest so as to regain our energy;
2. observe what happens within us and how events awaken our consciousness, revealing our emotions in moments of turbulence;
3. perceive signals coming from friends and family as well as the outside world, for these signals will point to the road of change;
4. let novelties come to us;
5. and, finally, be ready to pick the right moment to take action.

We must reconcile two apparently contradictory attitudes: leading a normal life while laying aside some time and attention for the creation of that inner nest that is necessary for profound changes.

When we are inwardly ready, we receive signals from the outside world: we receive job offers, we suddenly find a long-sought idea after reading a book or an article, we meet the right person, unusual coincidences open new paths… By devoting part of our time and attention to train our perception we will be able to recognize those signals.

I realize that this is not an easy task in a world that moves at tremendous speed. We must try to understand which goal we wish to attain and act accordingly. When we want to implement a profound change, the creation of an inner nest is a useful, even essential, option. If we want to adopt a merely superficial change, we can always go back to the more conventional formula, i.e. problem ➜ solution.

In conclusion, wasting our energy in the search of an immediate solution can only postpone the preparation of that inner ground, that “active inaction” which can engender profound and beneficial changes in our life.